Hey guys,

⚠️ Fair warning: this might get a bit emosh⚠️

Without any further ado, let’s move along the coast.

Esperance → Hopetoun

As I drove away from Esperance, the weather turned grey, and honestly, so did my mood.

I was leaving behind a place that felt like it could be home.

Of course, I could have stayed, but hey ho, adventure is out there!

As usual, no journey onward would be complete without a little sightseeing and the possibility of torrential rain.

Esperance Great Ocean Drive

Described as a stunning 40 km loop showcasing Australia’s whitest sands and turquoise waters.

I mean that would be true on a glorious sunny day. This day was not it but the views were great all the same.

Interestingly I did not see a single vampire!

My nearest and dearest know that I can be quite prudish. At the mere hint of an intimate scene on TV, I do get very embarrassed and typically make a cup of tea to avoid it. My BFF calls it me “going all Bridgerton.”

However, it is also known that I have absolutely no objection to being naked!

With that in mind, I braced myself. There was a nip in the air (meaning it was cold), and I got ready to rock and roll. Turns out, access to the beach was closed.

Probably the best outcome all round, especially for the photos.

This may come as a surprise. I know I often come across as supremely intelligent, but…

It was at this moment that I realised it was all just one long, fugging beach!

And also, perhaps, that Australians don’t know what a lagoon is.

Observatory Point

The website will tell you that Observatory Point gives you a great lookout to the Cape Le Grand National Park and that there is a monument to the explorers of 1792 who took shelter from a storm.

Whilst absolutely correct, what it failed to mention was the absolute heap of stairs required to navigate.

63 up to the lookout.

And approx. 317 to the beach at the bottom. I say approx. because by the time I got down there, I was trying to use my butt hole as an air intake tube.

Absolutely worth it.

Having managed to climb back up to JC and Jackson, I instantly regretted not having an automatic. Jelly legs was a serious understatement.

With the weather looking greyer by the moment and my legs barely able to operate the pedals, I had run out of desire to see 12 Mile Beach and 13 Mile Beach.

We pushed on to Hopetoun.

Hopetoun Beachside Caravan Park

Whilst at 11 Mile Lagoon/Beach, I received a phone call informing me that reception was going to close early. They gave me details for my pitch and also mentioned that there was a seal on the beach.

Becky, aged 6, was very, very excited.

I swear on Odin’s beard, the minute I switched off my engine, the skies opened and more rain than I had seen in nearly 3 months fell from the sky.

Becky, aged 6, was not deterred.

I put on my waterproof jacket and set off to become one with the seals.

Goddess Nanna did not prepare me for what was to come.

Bob

I bounced along to the beach like a child full of wonder.

I met a woman along the way who offered to show me exactly where the seal, who I named Bob, was last seen.

She also told me that NP and WL (National Parks and Wildlife) had been informed and were monitoring it. They think he has come to the beach to die.

What the actual fugg.

My lip actually quivered, and it took all my British reserve not to break down in front of this woman.

Becky, aged 47 and 11 twelfths, was distraught.

After seeing this beautiful boy, I retreated back to my van and sobbed. I cried for Gareth, for Jasper, for the mouse I accidentally ran over, for absolutely everything and anything.

The only thing louder than my sobs was the damn rain.

I am a sensitive soul and have an affinity for all animals, except perhaps maggots. So of course, not wanting Bob to be alone, I awoke early and went and sat about 50 m away from him and watched the sun come up.

This is a metaphor. There is no sunshine in Hopetoun. At this point, Hopetoun could officially go fugg itself.

A friend of mine tried to cheer me up and said seals do just come to the beach for a rest sometimes.

Not this guy. I found out he passed four days later and his name was George.

Hopetoun

Thoroughly dejected I set off in search of joy. Or at the very least a jetty.

Not the biggest jetty I have seen, but they do say that size isn’t everything.

It was exactly what I needed, and… do my eyes deceive me? Is that sunshine in the distance?

I would like to point out that I don’t think you guys fully understand the risks I take for these photos.

Behind the rocks, there was a small island known for seals. I jumped up to try and get a photo. I saw the wave coming but couldn’t get down quickly enough.

I adopted the brace position and turned around and successfully drowned my rear half. Oh how I laughed.

A quaint little town. I imagine, without weather gloom and seal doom, it might even have been enjoyable.

Knowing that Jesus loved me was just the sign I needed that there was indeed no hope for Hopetoun.

I needed to get the fugg out of dodge. So I did.

Waves (Dean Lewis – 2016)

Did you enjoy the time off? After a flurry of posting every other day,  I thought we all could use a break.

I completely overspent on my birthday and may have to wait for a New Year budget reset. Which New Year has yet to be decided.

In other news, I’m slightly all over the place at the moment. This wretched month toys with my emotions. One minute I think I’m living my best life, and the next I’m sat, winded by grief, crying my eyes out.

I often say that grief comes in waves. Some days it’s just ripples at your feet, the next it’s a tsunami. All I know is we just have to do our best to stay afloat.

Wherever you are reading from, hug someone or something close and tell them you love them.

XOXO